So there's this Christian Music Magazine that we sometimes buy for entertainment. As a tribute to their particular style of formatting, this newsletter will attempt homage with name-dropping boldness . . .

We ended last month in New Jersey, which is the home state of Bruce Springsteen. Friday, Saturday, and Sunday were spent with our new friends in Glassboro. Friday night we played for their college group, noticing that some of the attendees looked like the cast of Friends.	Friends!

Where's that Buzz?	They have one seriously huge church with the best sound system we've ever heard. However, there was a heavily armed deer who was looking for a fellow named Buzz, which is the same name as a character in the movie Toy Story, whose voice is provided by Tim Allen, former co-star of Pamela Anderson Lee, who went on to work with David Hasselhoff, who is very popular in Germany.

After worship on Sunday, we raced up to Lincoln Park, where we played the pre-Superbowl party for some excited young folks. John Elway was not in attendance, but my nephew was on hand to witness his first LOST AND FOUND concert. For some reason, people began biting their nails while we played.	Nervous, are you?

Here I Stand, Way Up Here!	The next morning, after staying at the home of old-friend JD Struckman, we went to play at St. Mark's Lutheran School in Brooklyn, former city of Garrison Keillor. Michael took advantage of an opportunity to fill in for Martin Luther. While there, we got some documents notarized to verify our entry in the John Lennon Songwriting Contest.

The following weekend, we played a Youth Encounter event in the town that boasts maintaining the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame. We met Rusty, and had lunch with his youth group.	Rusty and his pants Rusty's fellow youth and their lunch
Michael Bob Dylan Bridges	Also at this event, Michael tried to do his Bob Dylan impression.

Sunday afternoon, we flew to Ted Turner's hometown of Atlanta, where we were honored to play for the Youth Directors of the ELCA. A wonderful time was had by all and we got to see one of our favorite speakers, Rollie Martinson.	Don't go toward the light!

Eleanor busts a move

Then we had some days off. My daughter, Eleanor, showed me her dance moves to her favorite Lucinda Williams song (track 12 on Car Wheels on a Gravel Road). Our time off the road allowed Michael and me to become tan, rested, and ready, just like Richard M. Nixon. That was appropriate, it turned out, because our next appearance was in Marion, Ohio. Most people know Marion as the home of Warren G. Harding, who is mainly remembered for being involved in a scandal during his presidency, just like William Jefferson Clinton will likely be. The event in Marion was great, as always, and we had fun fun fun, till our daddy took the t-bird away, bringing to mind a famous Beach Boys song.

Marion began a big tour for us. I'm, in fact, writing this newsletter from the road, just like Hunter S. Thompson or P.J. O'Rourke might. Of course, being on the road puts one in mind of Jack Karouac, a sound writer. And speaking of sound, we recently upgraded our sound system. Here's a photo of our new speaker.	Rock on!
Hard-wired for sound	We needed special wiring for it and were able to set up a high-tech control system.

From Marion we began a big run, like Carl Lewis or Jim Ryun might. Sunday the 21st saw us racing across Trent Reznor's Ohio, Dan Quayle's Indiana, and into Liz Phair's Illinois for a concert in Libertyville. The next morning we played for a huge group of students at the Lutheran High School of Rockford. That night it was an intimate concert in Naperville, Illinois. We then drove past Springfield, home of Abraham Lincoln, and found ourselves in Chester, Illinois, home of (you're not even going to believe this one) Popeye! This concert was the funnest of the month and featured angry hornets acting like Ralph Cramden. I'd wanted to get a photo of the Green Hornet, but the admonition of Pee Wee Herman to "take a picture it'll last longer" slipped by me.

To prepare ourselves for the long drives as we headed southward, we bought another band's biography. On a previous tour we devoured the Aerosmith biography. The current tour found us reading the story of Kiss, whose bassist at one point dated Cher, who once did a movie with Nicholas Cage, who won an Oscar, just like Tom Hanks, who once portrayed an astronaut after the manner of John Glenn, a resident of Ohio, the heart of it all.

Anyway, our travels south took us to Gillett, Arkansas (home state of . . . now what the heck is that guy's name? . . . ) where we had a surprisingly large turnout. Unfortunately, I lost one of the crowd shots from that concert and so the Photo Phrenzy shows only half the crowd. My apologies to those on the groom's side.	A fine welcome

Neatness counts, but only so much

After that we drove to Mobile, Alabama, a city which is very difficult to enter from the east on a bicycle as we once found out. After that night's concert we drove even further south to Florida, where Jeb Bush is the governor. At the American Cheerleader Association camp in Fruitland Park, we spent the weekend with 250 confirmands. They didn't win any awards for cheering or picking up after themselves. However, these junior high folks are certainly a lot of fun, and that's something that lasts until after the t-bird is gone.

After the Florida event we headed north, just like Lewis And Clark did when they were exploring territory for Thomas Jefferson, not to be confused with William Jefferson Clinton. As I was saying, we headed north and that meant it would get cold, like Vincent Price or Al Gore. Michael became concerned and thought he'd better bring a heater of some sort. So he bid on an item at an auction, just like one might for a painting by Salvador Dali. He got a little portable heater that promises to keep him warm through the long nights in Georgia, a state that is always on the mind of Ray Charles.

Now that's portable!

Though the tour continues on, you'll need to check in next month for news of how things are going in March. Two things of note: Pete, our office companion, went to the Philippines, where Ferdinand and Imelda Marcos once lived, to visit the child he sponsors through Compassion International. Read about his experience. Secondly, if you'd like to see pictures of this month's Photo Phrenzy, click on the name of a famous photographer like Ansel Adams. Beyond that, there's not much to say, except that name-dropping out of context can look really silly, don't you think (like Albert Einstein)?